worried.

i have to admit i worry for everything. i'm not that kind of really optimistic person, but i'm trying to be. it's kinda successful at times, but now it just failed. i just can't stop worrying and can't put that thought away from my head. bah !! what worries me now is that i haven't even heard any reply from the universities. whereas b.s. got 3 of 'em .. ( congratulations my b.s. !!! i'm happy for u !!! <3 ) i'm not sure whether it's worth worrying, coz definitely b.s.'s result is better than mine, hehe. =))

i am starting to judge myself : have i made the wrong decision ?? was it ever wrong to pick up on a course which has only 20+ intake for a year? no. i didn't make any mistake this time. perhaps this a test for me, what started and what i picked wasn't easy. i just hope, i just really really hope i would hear reply from university as soon as possible perhaps ?? seriously , this waiting thing is daunting me, testing my patience. i hate it . =p

haha. i feel good now. i'll be keeping my fingers crossed to hear from cambridge, imperial, edinburgh, king's college, and bath as soon as possible. hope the reply i hear from them won't let me down. ying is praying hard, seriously . =))))

weee ~~~

i'm done wif 6 papers , finished 75% of my A2 final exams !! 25% more to go , and i'm off my hands on a-levels syllabus =)))))

these few weeks, i'm not quite sure what i lived for , exams perhaps ?? BMAT , TSA , A-levels , finishing them off one by one, unloading my burdens , now and finally, it's coming to and end. next week, i'm going bac penang, i'll be staying there for at leats 10 months before heading wherever i'm supposed to go.

coming to think of tat , i think ten months is really short. i'm gonna spend lots and lots of time with my family before time really goes out. oh ya of coz wif my frens too !! haven't been seeing them for ages, me kinda miss them . =*** hehe .

and following months would be busy, i think i would be working, and meanwhile , anxiously anticipating to hear news from respective universities for my application . i hope competition is not too tough , but for every 7 applicant, only 1 gets a place, is it hard to get in ?? especially me being an international student ?? anyways , i shall cross my fingers and pray for the best !! =))))

the journey is coming to an end. and a new one is yet to begin .

over-optimistic and totally clueless .

yes. i had my interview on hour 0930 - 1000, and i emo-ed till now, hour 0306 which is flashed on my computer screen.

my feelings rite now ? numb i guess. i was stunned, shocked, and panicked after tat . even tho i laughed and laughed and laughed during the interview session. ( laughter is my secret weapon =) ) well ... i have to say that i was totally underprepared. my first hand information told me that my interviewer is the director of studies in christ college, but who the hell knows that he's actually teaching chemistry ??????? all the while , i had been preparing myself to read science articles, thinking of being asked on general knowledge, but who knows he teaches chemistry ??? yeayea , blame me for being too naive and believing in all that.

when i first stepped in , i was asked to draw math graphs , later , i was bombarded with the science questions and one of the weirdest u might think of , what is the total number of cells in the body ? muahahhahaa. and why are we not silicon people ?? we are in the group 4 element , carbon people , and since they have same chemical reactions , why are we not called silicon people ?? weird. haha . but i managed to answer those .

but as to the basics , i failed completely . i forgotten all my basics !! i was too engrossed in preparing myself in the general knowledge part, preparing to get some questions on ... what's ur view on .... ??? but in the end, i got math and science questions. too sad. too bad. what shall i say ? it all depends on luck. not everyone gets into cambridge, no matter how hard u try, how smart you are , it all depends on ur performance during that crucial moment.

i shall try harder for my tsa . =)