over-optimistic and totally clueless .

yes. i had my interview on hour 0930 - 1000, and i emo-ed till now, hour 0306 which is flashed on my computer screen.

my feelings rite now ? numb i guess. i was stunned, shocked, and panicked after tat . even tho i laughed and laughed and laughed during the interview session. ( laughter is my secret weapon =) ) well ... i have to say that i was totally underprepared. my first hand information told me that my interviewer is the director of studies in christ college, but who the hell knows that he's actually teaching chemistry ??????? all the while , i had been preparing myself to read science articles, thinking of being asked on general knowledge, but who knows he teaches chemistry ??? yeayea , blame me for being too naive and believing in all that.

when i first stepped in , i was asked to draw math graphs , later , i was bombarded with the science questions and one of the weirdest u might think of , what is the total number of cells in the body ? muahahhahaa. and why are we not silicon people ?? we are in the group 4 element , carbon people , and since they have same chemical reactions , why are we not called silicon people ?? weird. haha . but i managed to answer those .

but as to the basics , i failed completely . i forgotten all my basics !! i was too engrossed in preparing myself in the general knowledge part, preparing to get some questions on ... what's ur view on .... ??? but in the end, i got math and science questions. too sad. too bad. what shall i say ? it all depends on luck. not everyone gets into cambridge, no matter how hard u try, how smart you are , it all depends on ur performance during that crucial moment.

i shall try harder for my tsa . =)

weirdo. additional post *winks*

well , the previous post published was kinda weird. but i'm trying to vent out my feelings, guess it didn't work. i shall try harder again next time perhaps?? hehe.

ok . here's a conversation between me and a ( mark the word i'm about to use ) stereotypist :

i was in a photocopy shop , having a chat with the aunty .
the photocopy shop is currently under a miniscule renovation , so i was asking about the shop

( the conversation below is in chinese- direct translation from chinese )
me: aunty, u're having renovation ah ??
aunty : yea , we're planning to move the computers to here. so that the counter won't be so packed with people in the morning .
me : oh i c. ( i kept quiet for a moment )
aunty : but u can see it later, u're now having AS exams rite ?
me : oh no aunty , i'm having A2 now.
aunty : so what are u going to study later ??
me : oh . pharmacology . produce drugs d ( well , pharmacology is not actually the production of drugs, but to help people understand it , i just made a generalisation )
aunty : oh , quite good hor, here u can't find this degree .

then ... here comes the uncle ( who overheard our conversation ) .

( the conversation below is in english. )
uncle : what are u studying gal ?
me : pharmacology.
uncle : PHARMATOLOGY ?
me : yea. ( i know i'm bad but i just don't bother to correct him )
uncle : then where are u going ?
me : UK perhaps .
uncle : oh , then u have to start to SPEAK ENGLISH !!! u know , there aren't a lot of chinese over there .

i was thinking ( uncle , aren't we conversing in english at this moment , right now ?? what does he mean like tat ?? i chose to speak watever language which is more preferable to me, it's my rights rite ? )
but i replied him this way ..

me : oh .. i dun think it would be a problem .
uncle : u know , BROKEN ENGLISH is not accepted there and there are not many chinese people around , how are u going to mix with people like tat ? ( i believe he's making an assumption that when chinese ed students speak english , it's all BROKEN. )
i just smiled and smiled .what more can i say ??

uncle , please don't stereotype people for speaking chinese. i can speak in two languages, but i prefer chinese coz it makes me feel closer to my roots. I love chinese culture. i don't abuse it. i speak chinese coz i'm proud of it. k ?? and i have confidence in myself that me speaking english won't be a problem in the near future. all the while , i've conversed with u in english and i believe the version u heard is the proper one. please don't stereotype me just because i prefer to speak chinese.

well . perhaps i was a bit too sensitive as well . u can ignore me if u feel so. =p

i need a break

stupid. i just finished paper 3and4 for maths !! i have 3 more subjects to go.

well, my mind is very crumpled up rite now. I have an interview on friday, assessment test on saturday and here i am, blogging ? hey, i need a break.

yes . yiying needs a break . =p