A date with sunshine

Sometimes, my life is just too overwhelmed with workload and life events that i couldn’t bring myself to blog with the right mood.

But today is an exception. For it is a sunny day. :)

“The sun, as radiant as a glowing bride, radiates warmth that penetrates deep into the heart.

And from there, it arouses feeling of contentment and plain happiness within the heart.”

So off I went to hyde park on a solo mission: to have a date with sunshine, took some nice shots, spent one and a half hour immersing myself in the joy of pure happiness. It was inexplicably awesome. : )

My favourite shot of the day :
*uploading failed* sorry, couldn't upload the pic. will upload it some other day :D

Aha. So this os a short post from me. Yes I’m busy these days but I’m still kicking and alive and bubbly!!

To my piling workload: I will conquer you someday. You will not take over me. NO.

Yes, sometimes I do feel like I’m breathing through scant air, but anyhow I won’t quit. Fight on, it is! And that is the way how it should be. :D

Goodnight folks. : )

reminder

加油!

is a word i need to constantly remind myself. i feel like i have just woke up from a deep slumber, and it is time to move on.

there are no ways of turning back time, and no time for looking back.

stride forward, it is. and it should be.


the little girl has to grow up, eventually. :)

winter

winter is creeping in, rainy and cold, as usual.

the trees have peeled off their gold coat, showing their bare backbones.

sunshine which is available at no cost in malaysia, is a luxury over here.

i hate winters, but i guess all we need to endure the cold winter is just some resilience and a cup of hot chocolate to keep us all warm.

i can't wait for spring again :)

buddha teachings

it is really hard to draw a boundary between dreams and reality.

DREAM :
when you wanna achieve something that's really far from you, really badly : like.. getting into harvard ?

REALITY :
when reality hits: you realised you don't have the capability to do so.

so, when these don't balance out each other, all is left is merely disappointment. how sad that is.

but hey, i learnt something from the buddhist society event i attended yesterday:
i) your should be content with your life.
so if everyone feels content about their lives, where and how does the society
improve?

the following is the answer for the question above :

ii) the purpose in your life is to make the world a better place.

so you should by any means strive to make the world a better place, and be content with what you have achieved thus far (if you have worked hard enough)

so work hard folks, let's make this world a better place.



okay. enough of rambling, time to get back to my antiviral chemotherapy :)

p.s. i never wanna get into harvard, that was just an example :)

2nd year. 1st month

here i am, just about to pass a month's life of my 2nd year in university, perhaps this is the time to review how i have lived my life for the past month.

there is this realisation that came across my mind : i have realised that i am neither here, nor there. i am just hanging in the middle, which apparently seems i'm not getting anywhere. so, not so good. but at the very least, i have taken the very first step and i guess the courage to make the first move, is a good start.

i have got drunk during my first month here. it was my ex-roomie's, laura's birthday and she poured me 3 cocktails. by the 2nd and half, i'm already tipsy. what happened after i got drunk was pretty embarassing and therefore i vow, not to succumb to the lures of alcohol. ANYMORE.

i have quitted learning french this year, for i am afraid i don't have time to cope with it. so, i guess it is time to do some self-learning and save the 185pounds for shopping and travel, and i pretty much count on my housemates to teach me :P so, no more french this year.

i have been missing my bernard sunley mates as well! i guess they have changed my perspectives quite a lot. and i somehow regret not spending enough time with them, i guess i spent a lot of my time last year with books. i could have learnt more from them. but anyways i do hope there is an opportunity to catch up with each other sometime, some day.

so, this is a short note from me.

and i would like to quote what my personal tutor said to me the other day : it is impossible to predict the future, so why not do what you enjoy best, and make the best out of it ? i guess it has wakened me up a bit. i have to admit : i am a person who likes order in life. i am a person who lives with 'to-do-lists' and deadlines, and i live on expected outcomes. this is good, but i guess i should let go of my principles and do what i enjoy doing, once in a while. my floormate last year, jae have been telling me to loosen up a bit, but i wonder why now only it starts to make sense. but i guess it's not too late yet :D

so, another 99 more steps to go !! jia yous!

love from london.

p.s. : it is really hard to blog and organise my thoughts after i haven't been doing this for a long time. but i promise i will come up with more exciting posts. next time :)

to my dear friend:

i was reminded,
how our dreams resonated,
just like songbirds echo-ing,
at the break of dawn.

i was reminded,
how many odds we have,
yet the similarities we share,
made us the right match.

i was reminded,
life is like a roller coaster ride,
though there are bumps,
but with you the gaiety never ends.

i was reminded,
of all the millions of people,
i must have been lucky,
to have met you in my life.


happy birthday vonne ! u and kath were right in my mind when i wrote this :)

p.s.: the 4th paragraph is just super cliche that it lacks orignality, guess i'm sleepy. will improvise upon it soon !! :p

home

dawn greeted me the moment the plane touched down on the lands of malaysia. the warmness radiated by the sun penetrates into the soul, the heart and fills it with joy and love. i know, the heart is at peace.

speaking of the greens of the grass, so uneven, which displays itself in a blend of hues, each stands distinctively on its own, yet blends well with the others, just like a multiracial country with each individual playing an important role on its own.

the familiar bahasa malaysia which was widely used in the airport, was perceived as a warm and welcoming language, at least it is one that foreigners would not understand, just like announcing a widely shared secret amongst the people of malaysia.

home feels like the soft velvety touch of carpets, smells like the sweet calming scent of vanilla, and tastes like caramel. here i am, wrapped in the blankets of warmth and joy.

i'm at peace now, for i'm back at home. =)




p.s. : on a side note, if i have a pet in the future, i would name it after dawn. :)

Petronas Chinese New Year Ad

one of the amazing tv commercials by yasmin ahmad.

i miss home. :)

a note to remember

doubt sees the obstacles,

faith sees the way.

doubt sees the dark of night,

faith sees the day.

doubt dreads to take a step,

faith soars on high.

doubt questions, "who believes"

faith answers, "I".


kays back to work. :)

venting

i am now holding on to the thin strand of reasoning.

please don't think i am very free, i am having exams.
i am not begging. i'm just asking. is it that hard ?
and the reason i'm doing this is not for me.
step back and look at the bigger picture.

please be considerate to me too.
please trust me and believe in me that i'm not being mean. i can't. i really can't.(usually i would try my best, but sorry i can't this time. i'm really really sorry.)
i have greater priorities ahead.

i am already under stress mode. don't make things even harder for me. please.

if it snaps and the little devil breaks loose, i dunno what will happen.

it is exam period and i just realised little things do make me get on my nerves. little things that i don't usually care. or won't be offended nor affected. things that i would usually say OK.

i am being over-sensitive and i hate myself for being so sensitive.


telling myself : come on, just get over it.

i'm alright.

LOVE and FORGIVENESS where art thou?

知足

知足 五月天 http://www.haoting.com/htmusic/400838ht.htm

那么多年了，依然动听。
那么多年了，五月天依然那么赞。

知足，依然能打动我的心。

知足者，常乐也。 但，知足岂不太难了？

寻梦，是知足吗？

Vanilla Twilight - Owl City

The stars lean down to kiss you
And I lie awake and miss you
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere

'Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly
But I'll miss your arms around me
I'd send a postcard to you, dear
'Cause I wish you were here

I'll watch the night turn light-blue
But it's not the same without you
Because it takes two to whisper quietly

The silence isn't so bad
'Til I look at my hands and feel sad
'Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly

I'll find repose in new ways
Though I haven't slept in two days
'Cause cold nostalgia
Chills me to the bone

But drenched in vanilla twilight
I'll sit on the front porch all night
Waist-deep in thought because
When I think of you I don't feel so alone

I don't feel so alone, I don't feel so alone

As many times as I blink
I'll think of you tonight
I'll think of you tonight

When violet eyes get brighter
And heavy wings grow lighter
I'll taste the sky and feel alive again

And I'll forget the world that I knew
But I swear I won't forget you
Oh, if my voice could reach
Back through the past
I'd whisper in your ear
Oh darling, I wish you were here

love it. <3

faith

the concept of faith is something abstract. inexplicable by actions nor words.

it depends on how much you are willing to sacrifice, especially when all seems bleak.

but no matter what.

keep faith. have faith.

for it is something that keeps us moving on.




cheers and love.

=)

awful

she has been in front of the computer, trying to absorb the materials into her tiny-weeny little brain.

BLANK.

BLANK.

BLANK.

how frustrating it is. when it is clearly understood that what needs to be done. yet the brain is not giving co-operation.

it is a sign.

I NEED A BREAK FROM WORK.

more happy thoughts please ? =)

pseudo-emo. :)

'We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore,
is not an act but a habit.'

Aristotle


how motivational it sounds when the soul is frail.

haha nah i'm alright. this is just one of the pulsating emo moments when i'm studying. i believe everyone has experienced it before so no big deal.

now i shall post this and get back to work !

*happy thoughts, happy talk*

xoxo

of books

seriously, what else can be better than a book as a present?

it is a wonderful little surprise i got from vonne. a parcel from amazon came today and it is a book from paulo coelho, adding 1 more to my current collection *wheeee~*

the title of the book is : like the flowing river.

and i never ever told her that of all prezzies, i love books most, for books are companions for life. especially good ones. :)

she understands me best.

i'm super duper touched. seriously i am soooooooo happy that i was literally jumping up and down when i received the book and my hallmate said: it's just a book, why are you so happy? no. no one can understand that happiness :)))

what else can i ask for from a friend who understands me like this?

*huggies for my awesome BFF*

A BIG BIG THANK YOU!! you are seriously an awesome friend, you might have realised that by now, :p

xoxo

from me, with lots of love <3

fairy-tale.

yes this is it. my early 21st bday present from vonne. a super early one i would say. :)

she said: good friends are like fairies. u can't see them but they are always there to help you when u need them.

so.. i love my fairy.

thanks vonne! it is splendiferous. *grins*

me heart u to bits.

xoxo

p/s: u know i'm never good at writing to express my feelings, i'm always the insensitive, the blur one, but.. i really mean it. thank you very much, deep down from my heart. <3

*super big smiley*

my bday is still a long way ahead.

signing off as nerd-wannabe for now :)

why leave man to the sixth day ?

Why leave man to the sixth day

A group of wise men gathered to discuss the work of God; they wanted to know why he had left it to the sixth day to create men.

"He thought about first organising the universe well, so that we could have all the marvels available to us," said one of them.

"First of all He wanted to run some tests on animals, so that He would not make the same mistakes with us," argued another.

One wise Jew showed up at the meeting. They told him the theme of the discussion: "in your opinion, why did God leave it to the last day to create man?"

"Very simple," commented the wise man. "So that when we are moved by pride, we would remember that even a simple mosquito enjoyed priority in the work of the Divine."

Haha. Love the story. Got it from paulo coelho's blog. :)

random stuffs that she misses.

yes. i miss each and everyone, everything here :)

my dearest bao bei. taken before bao bei left for india to pursue her dreams of becoming a doctor :)

my buddy ah wei. that was the only time we managed to see each other in .. half a year's time? :)

the 5s3 gang. taken at our fav dim sum hot spot. miss the company.

BFF camwhore shot 1 of infinity. ying, jul and vonne. i still like vonne with her short hair, although her long hair doesn't look bad either.

BFF camwhore shot 2 of inifinity. kath, ying and jul. kath i think u look pretty here.

pm 16. with our fav chem lecturer miss careen. everyone looked very different back then. :)

i miss my bed. i miss waking up by the sunshine which shines through my window :(

i miss penang food. prawn mee is hereby elected as the representative for all the yummylicious penang food hehe.

i miss mummy's home-cooked food. as simple as they appear to be but they are the best dishes in the world. mummy is the awesome-est when it comes to cooking :))

i miss my brother. he might make me get to my nerves sometimes, but still he is always the one to make me laugh / smile no matter what. he's the best. :)

my elder brother. he doesn't like to take pics. so he was giving me this cold stare when i was trying to take his pic. but he looks cool right ?? :)

i miss my sis. she's always the one who will bring me to bakery shops and buy me cakes. heehee.

the ones i miss most. daddy and mummy. oopsie i just realised daddy has a tummy :p

thanks for each and everyone of you who has been part of my life, for you are the reason for who i am right now.

no more time for emo-ing, for it's time to study. i shall mug all my way through easter hols!! exams , revisions here i come !! :))

oh i can't wait to go home. 2 more months and i'm back to my cosy, comfortable little home.

malaysia: i'll be back soon, wait for me! roti canai, nasi kandar, har mee, lobak, otak-otak, ikan panggang, curry mee, chee cheong fun, pasembur, cucur udang, char koay teow and all other awesome msian food, u're gonna go into my tummy soon :)

it's good to see when people wants to fly.

it makes me wanna fly as well :)

great. i will slowly grow my wings. :p

sad.

posted in the afternoon:

OMGness. i'm in such a bad mood now.

i just destroyed my lovely pot. i never believed i would have destroyed such a high quality pot.

i'm in utter despair right now. i seriously can't live without a pot .

EMO .. =((

i think i might be a sotong mutant with superpowers: the ultimate power to destroy. sigh.

EMO AGAIN.

i'm mad at myself.

posted at night:

ah. i just broke my desk chair. i'm seriously destructive today.

why oh why.

=(

and later on:

guess what? carl cut his hand with a butter knife whilst talking to me. can a butter knife cut ur hand ? i wonder. but it did just now. i must be carrying bad luck today.

caution: stay away from me ... =(((

BUT tong shui treat from shi yunn and ice cream treat from chloe made my day :))) i feel loved :p

the little girl

heart chants: i can't wait. i can't wait. i can't wait.

i can't wait for my parents to come on saturday. i can't wait to be their little girl once more.

2 more days to saturday. 3 more days to chinese new year! :)

oh yea, and 3 more days to valentine's day too ;)

i still miss the chinese new year celebrated with lots of hoo-has. :p

无题

这个世界太乱，

于是，

你迷失了方向。

漫游在谣言与欺骗中，

你断然决定，

不再选择相信。

夜深，

你沉思、并不断反问自己，

我变了吗？

你的眼睛依然雪亮，

但你的心，

已不再相信所眼见。

你的心在呐喊、抓狂，

你的心已透支了，

我看得出，听得见。

我知道，

你在徘徊，

徘徊于现今与从前。

你懊恼了，

对于现在的处境，

你万般不解。

你是飘流在激流中的纸船，

使命向前但奈何，

你还是逃避不了自己将沉陷的命运。

对不起，

我没能保护你，

让你受委屈了。

请相信我，这只是人生的小插曲，一切将会雨过天晴。＝）

a daughter's wish

how i wish i'm a strong pillar,

so that they can see me from far and reach out to me,

so that they can lean on me and never fall when they need me.

a strong pillar shall i be then. =)



*this post is just a random post, don't comment on this please*

insights

it is yet another sleepless night. she was lying on the bed, trying to catch some sleep, so that she can save some energy for the lecture next day.

then, a pleasant thought came to her mind along with flashback of memories, she decided to get up from her bed and write about it before it fades away.

so it started with a trail of memories:

when she was 18, she attended the UWC interview. thanks for the interview for it broadened her horizons. for the first time, she felt inferior when she compared herself to other 'articulate' applicants. she sensed the need to change. she decided to reject the offer to study in a matriculation college in kedah.

when she knew she was rejected for the jpa scholarship, she cried so hard for 3 hours that her eyes were puffy ( just like a goldfish ). the rejection shattered her dreams to study overseas. she made up her mind to enrol in a college, just like the city folks did. dad never understand her intentions and dismissed her as materialistic (at that point of time) . mum understood her deepest desire and supported her decision. they looked up at a college called taylor's college, where it seems to be the place where the smart city people goes to study. they have to pay RM9500.00 for the first term semester fees. if there isn't the RM4500 from her mum and RM5000 from her sister, it wouldn't have changed her life.

she remembered how hard her mum has to work to fund her for college, how she cried and cried over the phone when she encountered hardship, how family love and support has been her main pillar of strength all this while. she feels grateful, and she awes at the thought of how her inner thoughts have changed her life. her will to change. her will to improve for the better. if she didn't feel inferior that time, she would be a contented student about to enrol in matriculation college. if she didn't have sufficient funding to study in taylor's, she wouldn't be here right now.

here she is, sitting on a bed in her halls in london. never imagined it to be possible. she is living out her dreams, and she feels thankful to the universe, to everyone, to every incident that occured. for if it were not for those incidents, she wouldn't have been here.

waking up from her pleasant thoughts, she realised that the past has contributed to the position she is right now. yet life goes on. she has to move on and cope with all the workload and stress. but she knows it is all worth by the end of the day. she knows she will never regret for the opportunity given to study in london. she is eager to learn more, in all aspects of life. she knows that 'life' will be a good tutor and with positive attitude, she will win her own gold medal in life, someday. she believes so.

her quote: keep on learning. never give up. be grateful always.

p.s.: she can't wait till 13th of feb. she misses mum and dad so so much. and brothers as well. oh gosh she is such a pampered child =)

merry 2010 !!

so, 2010 is here!

MERRY 2010 PEOPLE

toast for a fantastic year ahead !!

not to say that i have a specific partiality towards a new year, nor 2010 is just indifferent compared to 2009. it is something quite the same, yet different. to me, it is definitely a new year, filled with expectations and hope.

it is yet again, another new year. a new year has made me realised that how much time i have wasted in the past on petty matters, contemplation and casting self-doubt when i should have moved forward. i have learned, not to regret on one's decision in the past, live with the present and plan for the future. life is short and i hope i can live life, exactly the way as i want it to be.

i am all geared up for a busy year ahead. i am not going to be smitten by the massive amount of study in imperial for i will plan my studies and enjoy life, at the same time. i have just realised that i have so many things i wish to achieve, and there is such little time! the saying that: life is about making dreams, and fulfilling it as you go along struck a chord in me. with the beginning of the new year, i will keep on making dreams, and realizing them as i move on in life.

no matter how busy, how hard, how tough life is, i shall fill it with joy, laughters and the FUN factor, because i love my life. welcome 2010 !!

i shall keep this simple and short. no more bogus crap. LOL.

to 2009: thanks for the bumpy ride. it is a life lesson well learnt.

to 2010 : for this year, i will laugh heartily and if i cry, may it be tears of joy.

*a big big grin on my face as i finish writing this*

p.s. : i have the strong urge of going madrid and barcelona lately, how? =D

p.p.s.: bao bei we're using the same template, coz i loved it once i saw it on ur blog, forgive me please for yes, i'm the bad copy cat =D

add-on: after i finished blogging, i went to the kitchen to get myself a cup of tea. and gosh, the tea tastes salty! i must have added salt to it rather than sugar and this is not the first time =( so adding one more to my new year resolution wishlist: no more yi ying's blurness syndrome ! i am serious weh. =)